Beacons of Light | A Tale of Two Families

Exploring Patriarchy – Chapter 1

Microwave Madam was starting to see.

She’d been looking around for years, stuck. Stuck and unwilling to acknowledge that women who had it easy had done something to get that ease. Labelling them lucky so she could ignore their wisdom. Lucky – that horrible word that women sometimes use without thought, to dis-respect or put down the achievements of other women. And to devalue the role of the homemaker.

She had changed and could now see solutions lying around in full sight. Solutions only visible when one is willing to see them.

Amid all those women who were digging their own ditches, she now saw the beacons of light. Family, friends and neighbours who had found small ways to happiness and made space for themselves in a comfortable manner, within the boundaries of the society they lived in. And they became her role models.

She began to learn that there are ways to make things work so that all within the family have freedom, love and support. She learned by looking and really seeing, for the first time in her married life.

A Tale of Two Families
Husband No 1 
Nothing to do, nothing to do,
my poor dear wife has nothing to do.

I come home from work and the house is so clean
and she's sitting and reading a magazine.
The food is all cooked and our ironing is done,
she looks like her day's been a lot of fun.

She has nothing to do 'cos housework is easy,
She nags! Maybe she needs some occupational therapy.
So I sit down and ask her to get me some water
to bring me my kindle and the newspaper.

I sit down and wait while she serves dinner
a little bit of work helps her keep her figure.

Husband No 2 
Too much to do, too much to do!
My poor dear wife has too much to do!

I come home from work and she's running around
the dinner's on the stove and the ironing not done.

The home and the family take all her time
and her life is too busy, she needs to have fun!
I walk in and get myself a drink of water
then help her bring dinner to the table.

My wife needs a break cos there's too much to do
so I help her at home when I'm able.

Wife No 1 (talking about Wife No 2)
Too much to do, Too much to do,
my dear friend really has too much to do?

Nothings done 'cos she works at a comfortable pace
she takes the breaks that she needs.
I envy her style, how she does with a smile
and the help that she gets makes me burn up inside.

I do so much more but it's always a chore
and I need to rest, but there's not enough time.
There's so much to do and no-one at home who helps me.

Wife No 2 (talking about Wife No 1)
Too much to do, too much to do,
my dear friend really has too much to do.

She doesn't know when to take a break
and thinks it's a sign that she's really great.
She's stressed all the time and she takes so much trouble
but what is it worth if she's always nagging?

Child of Couple No 2 
Too much to do, too much to do,
My poor dear mother has too much to do.

Child of Couple No 1 
Nothing to do, nothing to do,
my poor dear mother has nothing to do.
I need to find something for her to do.

I invite you to read all chapters of Exploring Patriarchy and walk with Microwave Madam as she explores the impact of patriarchy on her life and on society. And looks for solutions.

Published by Anitaelise

Anitaelise teaches piano lessons at Anitaelise Piano Studio and writes poetry and essays at The Relaxed Housekeeper. The blogs - and are written and owned by her and published in accordance with the copyright notice at the footer of each blog.

13 thoughts on “Beacons of Light | A Tale of Two Families

    1. This post is about one aspect of patriarchy practised by women. There are other aspects too, and I hope to cover some of them as I write. They are stories of strength – fiction based on real lives and struggles. My About page has more on this if this topic interests you. Glad you enjoyed the poem – I am a fan of Tolkein – from the most meaningful of his writing to the silliest poetry. I tried to copy the latter in this piece.


      1. Thanks, feedback much appreciated. So many families are struggling right now without maids due to covid19 and I feel families that don’t struggle need to speak out to say there is a way out within the barriers that each family has and wishes to preserve.


      2. It’s not just men helping, but also women being ok with them helping, and elder’s and the family community in general supporting this. Another HUGE factor is the inefficiency, and disorganization that is the result of having had maids all one’s life. I think if just that can be tackled, it will take a lot of stress off families and will eventually pave the way for the idea of personal independence.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Love the style of your post!
    And also so true – I’ve seen my own mum struggle with a job and a the household chores and my dad not being appreciative of all she does. So a very relatable post!

    Liked by 1 person

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